When a child passes away it is a traumatic and shocking experience for everyone. We are in unfamiliar territory that puts us in a place of unease. A community wants to be helpful; saying the right things and doing the right things. What are the best practices? We have created a guide to help educate friends, family, and community members during the initial week of shiva and beyond.
Judaism has a unique perspective on loss. We highlight here teachings from a Jewish perspective as well as universal teachings. We offer a collection of essays, articles and recommendations of books that address child loss, bereavement and related issues.
Ways to Remember
Many bereaved families have found memorial projects to be an important pathway to commemorating their child’s life. We have gathered meaningful ways families have chosen to memorialize their child.
FThere are many beautiful and creative ways people have chosen to memorialize a child. Below are ideas that others have put into action. These examples are meant help to those who are considering what they might do to eternalize their child’s memory in a concrete way.
For The Community
Friends and community members who keep the memory of a child alive can be of great support to the bereaved family. How do we show our sensitivity to the loss that a family member or a community member has gone through? We offer suggestions to help guide you.
For the Family
For those who have lost a child finding a way to memorialize and to keep your child’s loving presence with you and with your family and friends is so very important. We don’t ever want people to forget a beloved child that has passed away. We want to ensure that he/she remains forever in our minds and hearts.
Ways To Mark a Yahrzeit and/or a Birthday
What are some of the things that people have done in a more intimate way on a yahrzeit that we can learn from? Suggestions and examples are presented here.
Create Your Own Video
We thought that this would be a valuable gift to you and your family. So many of us who have lost a child have footage of our children on video and in pictures. We would like to help you make a video of your child. This is a video that you might watch together as family on your child’s birthday or yahrzeit, it might be a piece you share with friends through social media, or you might choose to keep it private and have it for your family. No matter how you choose to use it – this is for you, a keepsake that will help keep his/her memory alive in a meaningful ways. We have hired a professional team that will assist you with this. Please contact us to coordinate this special endeavor.F
Child loss is a topic often not spoken about. It is an extremely painful area to address so we tend to shy away from it. We believe that the more rabbis, leaders of the community, and lay people are educated in this area the better equipped they can be to serve as a source of strength for families that have lost a child.We offer to visit your Shul, JCC, school, rabbinical group etc. and offer our teachings in this area. Please contact us if you would like an opportunity for us to speak to your group.
Kaddish For Your Loved One
The ideal preference is that the close relatives of the deceased recite kaddish. When that is not possible, or as a supplement or safeguard to that, another person can be assigned to do so.In Our Heartsoffers you the opportunity for kaddish to be recited for the first eleven months after the passing and then on each yahrzeit. Feel free to contact us to arrange reciting Kaddish for any kind of loss